• Fifty Miles West

How to tell Your Family & Friends You’re Eloping

Updated: Aug 22, 2020

So you got engaged. Congrats!

While the following days and months are filled with excitement and joy of planning your life together with your loved one, there’s one thing that might be bugging you if you were thinking about eloping.

How to tell your friends and family you want to have an elopement? It’s like you have two voices in your head.

One is saying you cannot do that to your family, or you have so many friends and relatives to invite, and the other telling you how amazing it would to hike to the top of a glacier or elope on a beach, exchanging vows while looking at the sunset.

Destination Elopement

Of course, this special day is about the two of you and what makes you happy, so I’m here to tell you that you should listen to your heard and go with what it desires.

After all, eloping on a mountain top it is a darn adventure and an awesome story to tell your grandchildren one day.

It’s your love story, and you should make it an adventure of a lifetime if you want!

Be open about it

If you are someone that had always known they wanted to have an elopement instead of a big wedding, do not be afraid to start dropping hints early on.

While guys don’t always talk so often and openly about their wedding day, women from early on begin imagining and planning their big day.

Whatever the case might be, you can always talk to your parents or other friends and relatives that you like the idea of eloping.

You don’t have to say that you plan on doing that, but you can simply introduce them to the what does elopement mean and to the whole concept of it, so they are less surprised when you say you will be eloping.


For those that haven’t always known they will be eloping and you couldn’t have prepared your closest ones to what’s coming, being direct helps a lot.

Once you and your partner decide to elope and have an intimate ceremony focused solely on the two of you, sit down with your parents face to face, and tell them directly.

It is what you have decided, and your partner is on board, and there is nothing they can do to change your mind.

You can also tell them how financially good it would be since you can save a lot of money for further investments like getting your own house or saving for your children’s education instead of paying out a debt and so on.

Do not be afraid that they won’t understand. In the beginning, they might have it hard, but later on, as you employ the other techniques I’ll talk about, they will have a much easier time accepting everything.

After all, they love you and want you to be happy, so, of course, they won’t stand in the way of your happiness.

Include them in the planning

People aren’t afraid of what they know. They fear what they don’t know.

And this goes for every aspect of life.

Your family might not be familiar with the idea of the eloping and precisely what it is, but you can make this easier for them if you include them when you and your partner are planning the elopement.

For instance, if you are planning on doing it solo, meaning it’s just the two of you while eloping and there’s no one else except for the photographer, then you can still include them with some decision making like destination, dress, time or any other details.

If you are having trouble deciding which mountain top to climb and exchange vows on, ask them.

You don’t have to go with what they say in the end, but at least you will get some additional ideas, and they will feel included in your special day.

For those who decide to elope with a small number of family and friends, it might be more comfortable when breaking the news because, from the start, the people closest to you won’t feel completely excluded.

However, there still might be some questions and arguments around the whole elopement, so getting them involved with the entire plan will give them peace of mind.

You can find more about how to elope with family and friends here

Throw a party after the elopement

For couples that decide to elope by themselves, throwing a dinner party or a BBQ party might be a great idea to celebrate their union with the people closest to them.

After you come back from your elopement trip, invite everyone to your place, some drinks, and food, good music, and you have a great party.

Plus, this is a great way to show everyone the fantastic photos from your trip. Don’t worry, it won’t be showing off, but you will simply prove to them that eloping was the right thing to do.

All in all, remember that this day is all about the love between you and your partner. Your parents or friends may be disappointed or shocked initially, but they will come around later on, even if they don’t understand in the beginning.

You should go with whatever you feel is the right thing for you and forgo what everyone else thinks.

If you have any questions about eloping, planning-wise, photography services, or merely general tips, do not hesitate to contact me. I’m always happy to help couples have their dream wedding.

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